Dating Tips for Men: Time Management - Part 1

By Vin DiCarlo

Dating can be your best friend.

...OR your big enemy.

Often, a guy can feel like a slave to his biological need to procreate.

Then there's that common phrase, "He thinks with his... You know."

Well it is hard NOT think that way if you are physically unsatisfied.

But men are also goal oriented.

We make our actions to achieve things and influence the world in a positive way.

I've personally faced one of the biggest challenges and it is balancing the two - my carnal obsession and achieving my goals.

When you are single, dating can consume a lot of time. Women will suck away at your time if you don't know what you're doing.

Before you know it, you are spending hours in the park, feeding the birds and cuddling... there's nothing wrong with spending a quality time with your girlfriend, AS LONG AS YOU DON'T compromise YOUR GOALS IN LIFE.

Goals take time, but so do women.

In fact, it's the nature of a woman to take up the man's time - it's her way of getting you to invest in her. That way if the woman gets pregnant there's a less chance of you leaving (this comes from our caveman days, so to speak).

It is really tricky to manage your time with women. You see, giving their time to women is what most guys WANT to give. By nature men are "givers." They like to please women, protect them, and give them good feelings.

Guys have also a urges that can completely take over your thinking.

Both of these things can get of you making the most of your life, your time.

Now take a minute to ask yourself about this, "WHAT DO I REALLY WANT TO GIVE TO WOMEN?"

Now I bet it is not about "money," or "control over my life," or "lots of my free time."

It was probably something like "relaxation, excitement, feeling of safety, good feelings, sexual pleasure, make her smile or feel good about herself, etc."

I think men have problems with how they use their time with women in two ways.

First, they overcompensate with other stuff - like spending too much time or money on a woman because they think that the gifts they REALLY wanted to give aren't that valuable.

Second, men think that they are "getting" something valuable when a girl spends time with them.

Society brainwashes guys into believing that women are a prize to attain, and that there's some inherent value in a pretty face.

It's not TRUE!

The best thing is to see women for what they are, nothing more, nothing less. They are cute, sometimes fun, but ultimately not that important, AND THEY CAN'T COMPLETE YOUR LIFE!

Now it is really hard to break out of this mental prison of feeling inferior to women.

Your mental habits are subtle and hard to notice because you've been doing them for years.

About the Author:

Get a FREE 45 minute masterclass on The Attraction Code. You can sign up here: Dating Tips for Guys and also receive the Attraction Code Letter delivered straight to your email.

Useful Mindsets in Dealing with Male Competition - II

By Vin DiCarlo

The idea that the other man can be more "dominant" that you are is the next important thing that I want to talk about.

The alpha male during caveman days had a real power - he knows where to get resources like food, and was physically stronger, that he could beat up competitors. The concept of the alpha male is completely obsolete.

But ask yourself if those powers are relevant today. Every man with a source of income can survive on his own - if you're reading this, you probably have access to food and shelter. You're all set.

Plus, in this modern world it is irrelevant to use the physical strength just to beat people up. It's illegal.

Attacking another person will always end you up defeated because the police always win.

If you think about it, you are LETTING RANDOM GUYS STOP YOU FOR NO REASON!

Just excuse my French, but who is HE to say who YOU talk to???

It makes me mad- I recall all the women I missed out on because I was worried about some DUDE. And I get mad knowing that other guys are dealing with same crap!

When you're on your deathbed, you are going to look back on all the things you did and didn't do. How painful would it be to say "I didn't meet that girl because I was scared of another guy," or "there were so many beautiful women I could've enjoyed, but I didn't even try because I saw them TALKING to another guy."

I don't want you to be like that.

So let's analyze it deeply. You truly don't understand dominance if you are seeing the other guy as more dominant.

You see, you instantly consider yourself NOT dominant when you're concerned with who is more dominant. There's a better focus.

To be dominant, you must first THINK like a dominant man. And dominant men don't think about who is dominant. So what do dominant men think about? Whatever it is they are doing or want.

So you see another guy talking to a group of girls. Instead of worrying about whether or not he's more dominant than you, focus on the girls.

It's proven to be a waste of time if I have to acknowledge other guys. Out of 10 women, 9 of them doesn't even know the guy - they just meet him.

Or if they do know the guy, it's because he was a friend of ONE of the girls, and the rest barely know him.

It's seldom for women to go out with a guy they are dating - normally they will bring a guy that is more of a protector/friend because a guy like that is more valuable when they go out on the town.

Besides, if he IS with one of the girls, that means he's NOT with the other girls - they are fair game.

When you are concerned with who's the alpha male, you are by definition NOT the alpha male. In fact, it's questionable whether alpha males truly exist in the modern world.

Avoid some assumption, just get your focus in a USEFUL place, and don't allow some random dude to stop you from enjoying YOUR LIFE!

About the Author:

Get a FREE 45 minute masterclass on The Attraction Code. You can sign up here: mystery method and also receive the Attraction Code Letter delivered straight to your inbox.

One Night Stands and the Pick Up Artist II

By Vin DiCarlo

First of all, if you're going for a one-night stand, there's one thing you need to know -- You won't always be able to get the hottest girl in the venue to go home with you.

You can get a solid number from her, but whether or not a woman is open to going home with a guy on a particular night varies widely.

But there are lots of horny women that are open to get physically fast and wants to get laid that same day or night. All you have to do is know how to spot them in any situation whether it is a day or night or in the club, bar and park.

The things that I look in spotting them are in the way how they dressed, how much make-up they put on their face and other things that relates to how they look physically. Remember that there is a reason why women exert a lot of effort in order to look beautiful.

They want to be approached. This of course, isn't always true, but is generally the case.

You will also know that a woman is seeking attention when she is so loud, hyper and animated.

And the last thing that I look for, are women that are all standing and scoping around the room with blank expressions. Also those women that is looking around the room more often than the other girls in their group.

They are basically putting themselves out there, waiting for someone to approach them.

Now you have to take this in mind -- Avoid running your clever routines into full-stream and your cocky frame control stuff when approaching those women.

Just be light, social, and let them know you are interested in meeting them. A simple "hey, you guys look great tonight. Special occasion?" is enough.

The key here is not to openly discuss getting in sensual or that you are looking to take her home. You see, if you talk about that, you'll put her on the spot and make her agree to bang with you, implicitly.

Or also, build sensual tension with her, as we discuss heavily in our workshops.

The woman will force herself to keep distance from you because that is against her "rules". And you need a logistic information in order to figure out how to bring her back to your place

The real key to all this is subtracting any overt sensual intention, and not trying to pick her up.

You have to be willing to let go of controlling the situation, and just enjoy yourself, while escalating appropriately.

Although it may seem as counter intuitive, but this is how it works.

You must trust that women wants to be in bed and there are a lot of women in the club, bar or in any venue that wants to get a same day lay.

Some won't, but some will, and that's why it's key that you get a sense of what to look for, and how to proceed.

I know you don't what to invest a lot of your time to pick the right girl and then just mess it up after a long interaction. Or to spend your time to a wrong girl or worse.

It's not worth wasting your time for that.

About the Author:

See what Vin has to say about VH1's Mystery the Pick Up Artist show.

The One Night Stands of the Pick Up Artist II

By Vin DiCarlo

First of all, if you're going for a one-night stand, there's one thing you need to know -- You won't always be able to get the hottest girl in the venue to go home with you.

Bringing a girl home doesn't based on whether she is open or not in going home with a guy, sure maybe you can her number but it varies widely on particular night.

But there are lots of horny women that are open to get physically fast and wants to get laid that same day or night. All you have to do is know how to spot them in any situation whether it is a day or night or in the club, bar and park.

I look for a few things - first, I notice how they are dressed, how much makeup they have on, etc. If they look like they put a lot of work in to being pretty, it was for a reason.

The general reason is that women wants an attention and be approach. Although this isn't always be the reason but a a lot of time it is the case.

You will also know that a woman is seeking attention when she is so loud, hyper and animated.

And the last thing that I look for, are women that are all standing and scoping around the room with blank expressions. Also those women that is looking around the room more often than the other girls in their group.

They are basically putting themselves out there, waiting for someone to approach them.

Now when you approach, take it easy - don't go in full-steam running your clever routines and your cocky frame control stuff.

Just be light, social, and let them know you are interested in meeting them. A simple "hey, you guys look great tonight. Special occasion?" is enough.

The key here is not to openly discuss getting in sensual or that you are looking to take her home. You see, if you talk about that, you'll put her on the spot and make her agree to bang with you, implicitly.

Or also, build sensual tension with her, as we discuss heavily in our workshops.

The woman will force herself to keep distance from you because that is against her "rules". And you need a logistic information in order to figure out how to bring her back to your place

The real key to all this is subtracting any overt sensual intention, and not trying to pick her up.

Just enjoy yourself while escalating appropriately and have a willingness to control the situation.

This is how it will works although it may sound that counter intuitive.

You must trust that women wants to be in bed and there are a lot of women in the club, bar or in any venue that wants to get a same day lay.

Some won't and some will, and that is why you need to know how to spot and get them.

I know you don't what to invest a lot of your time to pick the right girl and then just mess it up after a long interaction. Or to spend your time to a wrong girl or worse.

That's a HUGE waste of time.

About the Author:

Mystery has a brand new show on vh1. Mystery taught Neil Strauss.

The One Night Stands of the Pick Up Artist II

By Vin DiCarlo

First of all, if you're going for a one-night stand, there's one thing you need to know -- You won't always be able to get the hottest girl in the venue to go home with you.

You can get a solid number from her, but whether or not a woman is open to going home with a guy on a particular night varies widely.

However, there are LOTS of horny women moving around the clubs and bar anytime of the day that are open in getting lay that same day or night. And all you have to do is have a knowledge and ability to spot them.

Some of the few things that you should look for are on the way how they dressed up and on the way how they put some make-up. Many women exerts a lot of hard work just to look beautiful. And you know there is a reason for it.

They want to be approached. This of course, isn't always true, but is generally the case.

You will also know that a woman is seeking attention when she is so loud, hyper and animated.

Lastly, another good prospect are woman that are looking around the room more than the other girls that she's with. Also a group of two or three women all standing around with blank expressions, scoping the room are another prospect.

They are basically putting themselves out there, waiting for someone to approach them.

Now when you approach, take it easy - don't go in full-steam running your clever routines and your cocky frame control stuff.

You have to let them know that you are interested in meeting them, A simple "hey ladies, you all look great tonight. Special occasion?" is enough. Its just have to be light, warming and social.

You should not openly discuss to the woman that you are looking to take her home and get her into bed. Because, if you talk about that, you're putting a woman to a point where is to agree to implicitly bang with you.

Rather you want to build sensual tension, as we discuss heavily in our workshops.

This will be against a woman's "rules" and she'll definitely be keeping distance from you. And you really need a logistic information to know how you can get her back to your place.

The important thing here is to act as NOT trying to pick her up and eliminating any overt sensual intention.

You must have the willingness to control the situation and knows how to enjoy while having the escalation in the right way.

It may sound counter intuitive, but that's how it works.

You have to believe that women wants to have sex and a lot of women in the place wants to have a fast getting laid down.

Some won't and some will, and that is why you need to know how to spot and get them.

I know you don't what to invest a lot of your time to pick the right girl and then just mess it up after a long interaction. Or to spend your time to a wrong girl or worse.

It's not worth wasting your time for that.

About the Author:

Vin DiCarlo is an expert pick up artist trainer, who's highly controversial website DiCarlo DiClassified

Useful Mindsets for Disarming Male Competition-I

By Vin DiCarlo

Have you avoided having a conversation to a woman just because she was talking to another guy?

Or maybe you avoided approaching a group of girls with one or two guys with them because you feared embarrassment just because you ASSUMED that those guys were cooler than you.

There are two reasons why guys have a fear in talking with women who were with other guys.

They think that the woman is "with" the guy, and assume he's her boyfriend.

Guys shouldn't think this as a barrier of talking to a woman. Plus - she's not a guy's "slave" or a piece of property, so she is free to talk to whomever she chooses, especially in a social situation like in the bar where people meet other people.

You will extremely look confident if you approach more often a woman who is "with" a guy and this can draw out the guy's jealous side, making him look weak and insecure.

The second reason why guys don't approach woman who is "with" a guy points to a deep insecurity based on a simple misconception.

Men tend to be threatened by other men, instantly assuming that the "other guy" is stronger, cooler, or somehow more powerful.

This is founded in an ancient survival strategy that has been hardwired into the human brain.

In any given interaction, its often hard to tell who the more "dominant" person is. So when a male is confronted by another male, he doesn't know how dominant the other guy is. The social hierarchy is very subtle, and mostly unconscious.

A guy doesn't know if he will be embarrassed verbally, or as was probably common thousands of years ago, beaten up.

So it's smart to play it safe by assuming that the other guy is a threat. Males who were too bold may have won a few confrontations, but all it took was one loss to end up dead or exiled from the tribe.

And then their genes were taken out of the "game" so to speak.

Usually the one that can lived long enough to survive and reproduce are those guys that played it safe and avoided confrontation.

The irony is that most of approach anxiety nowadays have the basis on this hard-wired survival strategy - the false assumptions of the guys will lead them to unnecessarily avoid women.

The thing is, when you are in the bar or club and you see a woman talking to another guy, you would think she's not WITH him.

They JUST MET!

I can't tell you how many times I've approached a woman thinking she was "with" a guy, only to find out he was some random dude who just approached her. Or he was just a friend or relative.

I have regrets when I remember that I used to completely not talking to a woman because I saw her being with another guy. So many opportunities that I've wasted. This brings me to my first point:

YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT HE MEANS TO HER. DON'T ASSUME THEY ARE TOGETHER UNTIL YOU SEE PHYSICAL EVIDENCE.

You will know it if you try to act and find out. Just remember that in time that they are together you should be alert an respectful, the guy may be the insecure jealous type and may start a confrontation.

So be smart and wise - don't just stick around on having a false judgment.

About the Author:

Mystery's The Pick up Artist Season Two is coming on VH1. Mystery appears in Neil Strauss the Game.

Managing Your Time when Meeting Women - Part 2

By Vin DiCarlo

Young men are taught that their urges is crude and silly, and that it is just a favor that women ALLOWS them to mate with them.

There's a syndrome that I call a "doofus dad" syndromeThere's another societal factor going on, . In almost every TV commercial and sitcom, the "dad" or "boyfriend" or "husband" is a dopey, incompetent goof, and the mom/daughter/girlfriend/wife has to use her superior intelligence to fix the situation.

This leads to the perception that women are "better," and thus, their time is more valuable than yours.

You will feel required to give a lot of your time to a woman if your time is not so valuable.

But here's the thing - if you are giving a woman too much time, you won't be present for most of that time. You will be distracted, resentful, you will give her your "half-assed" attention.

I realized this after analyzing tons and tons of dates I went on with women.

After a while I started giving women smaller amounts of my time, but my FULL ATTENTION.

Not only did this make our time better, it created MASSIVE ATTRACTION because I left women craving more.

Now my girlfriends can't get enough of me - in fact, I don't GIVE THEM "enough."

Ask you know, "enough" would mean, "overexposure" to me, and women can't be pulled to what they already have.

The proper way to manage your time is by being HONEST. And I don't recommend you to play games with women and pretend to be busy or whatever.

No games, just be real with her - don't spend more time that you want.

Be a man on the go - focus on your personal goals, and enjoy whatever free time you have with women.

Now in a short amount of time it requires that you are able to meet a lot of women, which I'll have to cover in another newsletter.

It's not good to see that men waste their lives chasing and "putting up with" girls, and then they are left out ALONE.

Women aren't property that you can keep or somehow take with you when you die. Think about that.

You can't "keep" a woman by investing all your time with her.

Another point that I want to give - when you start being honest about how much time you're going to give to a woman, you may feel GUILTY.

It's either a girl will try to make you feel guilty, or you will feel it on your own. This is ok, it just means you have a weak focus.

You see, if you are following your true path, it will usually stray from the social norm.

If you are in the habit of adopting the values that others try to impose onto you, you will probably experience some tension, guilt, discomfort, even loneliness at first.

That is why I discover and develop the Attraction Code. You can learn about self-control, finding true path, and letting the real 'you' deep within.

And no, we don't intend to impose our goals to you. I think you are capable enough to handle it to yourself, given the proper guidance.

Vin

About the Author:

Get a FREE 45 minute masterclass on The Attraction Code. You can sign up here: Dating Tips for Men and also receive the Attraction Code Letter delivered straight to your inbox.